Today is my 20th Mother's Day without my mom.
This is the last picture I have of Mom. It was taken on Easter 1990 with her precious granddaughter, Katie at Deb & Mike's place.
Twenty-one years ago, on May 15th, she passed away. Randy and I had Mother's Day at our house in Milton, and she was gone from us two days later. Although it has been a long, long time since I relived that day and the days that followed in my mind, I can't see twenty or thirty or more years fading the memories that I have.
It is a marker of time in my life, before Mom and after Mom. Time, of course has rounded down the edges of the sadness of losing her. I think I have a lot of traits that my mom had. I certainly have her hands, I got my height from her and there are times with just a brief glance in a mirror, my first thought is 'What is Mom doing here?' And then I realize that it is just me. Wishful thinking or resemblance, I don't know. I just know that it is just me alone.
In doing this blog, I have spent a fair amount of time going through old photographs - Mom & Dad when they got married, Deb and me as kids and as teenagers, camping and graduations. You know, the entirety of your life held in a shoebox, or if you are organized enough, photo albums. Going through a lifetime of pictures has to be right up there with Christmas to be the chief source of melancholy.
We all get it, this melancholy, I am not special. Whether it is going through photographs, watching an old favorite movie, or when a holiday rolls around, melancholy, like pooh, happens to us all. Whether we admit it or not.
Mother's Day does it for me. I have often mentally just shook my head at the abruptness of it ... Mom walked out of my house on Sunday afternoon and for all practical purposes, was gone on Monday. In my mind, even the weather doesn't change that quickly.
She is missed, that mother of mine.
Not only is today Mother's Day it is also Randy and my wedding anniversary. I can happily say that Randy has put up with me yet for another year. This makes a total twenty-four for us. And no, we are not taking it on a year-by-year basis. Randy and I both are fully aware that we are in this until the end.
We both kicked around a couple of ideas to celebrate. I am all for going out in the boat. Randy suggested Italian at a restaraunt that just opened up in town.
Heck, we may just live it up and do BOTH.
And a very happy 28th anniversary to our wonderful friends, Ed & Nina.
Have the BEST day ever!